Girls

TYPES OF GIRLS


1. GOLD DIGGER
Advantages:
A. Always looks good
B. Will give up the booty when you're spending cash
Disadvantages:
A. Will ONLY give up the booty when you're spending
cash
B. Wil leave you for the next sucker who has more
cash-flow

2. HOOCHIE
Advantages:
A. Always down to give up the booty
B. Looks good to all your friends, which boosts your
ego
Disadvantages
A. Probably has slept with all of your friends or,
eventually will.

3. CHICKEN HEAD
Advantages
A. Down for "what-eva"
B. Booty-call material
C. Will believe most of what you say, and doesn't care
about the truth
D. Has your back in most situations and will
bust-a-cap, if needed.
Disadvantages
A. Will bust a cap in YO ASS, if need be
B. Ghetto as hell
C. Comes with MAD drama included

4. Ms. "I'm looking for a relationship"
Advantages
A. Will give up the booty as long as you seem ready
for a relationship too
B. Usually looks good every time you see her
Disadvantages
A. Really looking for a husband
B. Will leave you if you start acting like you don't
want to get married, or can't say exactly when you
will be ready
C. Will bug the hell out of you until you either
commit, or leave her

5. EX-GIRLFRIEND
Advantages
A. You can always go back to hit it again if you throw
her a few lines that make it seem that there's a
slight possibility that you two may be getting back
together.
B. She looks even better now that you are not with her

Disadvantages
A. She looks better now that you are not with her
B. She has caused you major drama


6. YOUR BABY MOMMA
Advantages
A. See advantages for ex-girlfriend
Disadvantages
A. See disadvantages for ex-girlfriend
B. She's hitting you up for child support


7. Ms. "I' m lookin for a daddy for my kids" AKA
"Someone else's BabyMomma"
Advantages
A. Will give up the booty as long as you seem like a
good prospect for the job
B. Will do almost anything to get some help with her
kid's
Disadvantages
A. See Ms. "I'm lookin for a relationship"
B. Might get pregnant for you too, thinking that you
might stay if she has your child, which is the same
illlogic that got her caught up in the first place.

8. Ms. "I don't NEED a man because I have my own shit"

Advantages
A. She has her own shit
B. All she really needs from you is one thing
Disadvantages
A. She reminds you every chance she gets that she
doesn't need you until you get tired of hearing it and
leave


9. "The Perfect Woman"
Advantages
A. Cooks
B. Cleans
C. Looks great
D. Sexes you up
E. Doesn't ask where you've been
F. Doesn't ask for much
G. Carters to your every need
Disadvantages
A. Is usually a Ms. "I'm looking for a relationship"
or,Ms. "I'm looking for a daddy for my kids" in
disguise
B. Everything will change once you make a commitment,
especially if you marry her.


10. THE ALMOST PERFECT WOMAN
Advantages
A. Looks great, doesn't ask where you've been, or any
other questions
Disadvantages
A. She's probably sleeping with someone you know


11. Ms. "I'm waiting on God to send me the perfect
man, and, even though I'm in the club tonight, I'll be
in church tomorrow"*
Advantages
A. May bring some morality to the relationship
Disadvantages
A. The morality only applies when it's appropriate for
her to make a point, or it's to her advantage


12. DICK TEASER
Advantages
A. Will give it up on the dance floor
B. Usually looks pretty good
C. You can always tell your friends that you've hit it
and they will believe you
Disadvantages
A. she'll let everyone else hit it but you...or at
least, that's what they've told you.


13. Ms. "Friend"
Advantages
A. Someone who finally understands you
Disadvantages
A. You will always be attracted to her, but don't want
to fuck it up by making a move.
B. Can tu rn out to be a Tease


14. Ms. "Trick-Ass-Bitch"*
Advantages
A. None
Disadvantages
A. See disadvantages for Gold-digger, Hoochie,
Chickenhead, or BabyMomma

*Note-was considered your girl, until you realize, you
got PLAYED.*


15. STRONG BLACK WOMAN
Advantages
A. Same advantages as Ms. "I don't need a man because
I have my own shit", but hasn't had a man in a while
so it's easier for you to hit it, and run.
Disadvantages
A. Same disadvantages as Ms. "I don't need a man
because I have my own shit"
B. Will test your nuts once and a while, which may
land you in some domestic violence classes.



16. Ms. "I got screwed over in my last relationship so
I'm going to take the shit out on you"





Advantages
A. Will give up the booty to show her ex that she has
moved on. Disadvantages
A. Takes all the s... out on you, meaning she doesn't
trust you,always thinks you're cheating, and becomes
needy once she believes you really are different.

17. Ms. "I'm one of the guys"
Advantages
A. Likes sports
B. Low-maintenance
Disadvantages
A. Wants to hang with you, when you want to hang with
JUST the guys.
B. May beat you at competitive sports.
C. You might wanna do a d... check before you try to
hit it.